Note to Self

Last week I spent an afternoon at my parents' with my children acting like wild animals (isn't it funny how they choose just the right times to act up--the sermon at church, the checkout at Target with a teacher from your child's school behind you, a playdate at a friend's whose children could have played the roles of Jane and Michael Banks in Mary Poppins). Anyway, this time my boys' crazy antics paid off. My Mom, having total pity on me, called to offer me every stay-at-home mother's dream--an afternoon off! Well, today was my big day. I dropped the two youngest at my parents' and walked (ok, ran) out the door. I found myself humming the tune "Born free, as free as the wind blows. . ."as I started my car engine.

Where to go first? My finally finished Christmas cards sat in a shoe box on my front seat, so I headed to the post office to get them off in the mail. The line was out the door, but that didn't deter me. I had no one whining at my side that they were hungry or to pick them up. Life was good. And after about five minutes of not moving a single step, I was beginning to wonder if this was the best use of my precious time. I didn't even have a magazine to read. Five more minutes ticks by, and the line has finally moved a couple feet. I tick off my mental list of the other stuff I want to get done in my afternoon, check out my options for stamp designs on the jumbo wall poster, daydream about what all the packages everyone is having shipped out might contain. Fifteen minutes in line. I'm beginning to think that standing in line with my kids would have helped pass the time, or at the least kept the other customers entertained. Finally, after 20 minutes, it is my turn at the counter. I assuredly request two books of stamps and an extra ten to mail my 70 cards, pay, and head to the counter to start afixing the postage. Wait a second, did anyone else just catch that? Did I just stand in line for 20 minutes only to buy the wrong number of stamps?!? I shove the 50 stamps I bought into my shoebox and walk out the post office door the line is still spilling out of. Note to self: If I find myself standing in line at the post office for 20 minutes with nothing to do, don't spend it daydreaming. Calculate the correct number of stamps I will need so I can get the darn cards in the mail!

Back to the car, and onto stop number two: Walmart. I generally don't shop at my Walmart--it's dirty, smelly, and always messier than my kids' playroom on its worst day. But something I saw on Amazon had me in a panic the night after Thanksgiving. A few of the toys on the boys' lists were nearly double what they were advertised at Target and Walmart. I decided to be a smart shopper and order the items from Walmart.com and have them shipped to the store free of charge. I received email notification just yesterday the the items were ready for pick-up. I wait in, surprise!, another line. My turn comes quickly and the clerk goes into the depths of the back room to retrieve my packages. I pick at my fingernails, read and reread all of the safety recall notices on the bulletin board, examine the array of gift cards, and wish I had brought a magazine to read. Fifteen minutes later she emerges with my boxes. Note to self #2: The whole point of ordering online is to not have to stand around waiting for your packages to arrive. Next year, just pay the money to get them shipped to the house--it's worth it!

Well, by now I am over an hour into my afternoon, and all I have to show for it is five toys. I'm feeling a bit disgruntled. I scury home, hide the boxes, and contemplate whether or not to drive three towns away in search of another Christmas gift: the ever elusive and out-of-season sand and water table before my 6:30 PTO meeting. Yeah, I have enough time, and when would I get another time without the kids to do this. Back in the car, and back to more waiting--this time in rush hour traffic. Are we seeing a theme here?! I walk into Toys-R-Us, and wow, no line at the customer service desk. I head over to the outdoor toy section in the next aisle to find the item I want in the catalogue, and then go back to customer service. Two minutes, that was all it took me, and now the line at CS is 4 customers deep. This is just not my day. Waiting and more waiting as I am shuffled from one clerk to another. And nope, they don't have the table in stock and can't get one for me from another store. One cell phone call to my husband and that table is ordered online. Note to self #3: Skip the stores, and just order online or let Perry do all the shopping next year!

Now, I'm rushing off to PTO with a quick stop at Dunkin' Donuts for a bagel and coffee dinner. My afternoon of freedom wasted on waiting. I can look on the bright side, at least my kids had fun with their grandparents!